TAKE A BREAK ! STOP FOR A LAUGH ! 

 

An  elderly  lady called   the  police  station  on her  mobile.

She  desperately  explained  that  her car  had  been  broken  into.

Hysterically  she  scrreamed to  the  dispatcher  ‘ The  stereo  is  missing,

the  steering wheel  is  missing  !  They’ve  stolen  the  brake pedal,  and  ….

O,  my  God!   They  have even  taken  the  accelerator!’

‘Madam,’   said  the  dispatcher, ‘try  and  calm  down,  an  officer  will  be  with  you

in  a  few  minutes.’

A  few  minutes  later  the  officer  called  into the  station…

‘Disregard complaint ’  he  said   ‘ She  got  into  the  rear  seat !’

A foreigner  was  driving  down  the  freeway,  the  car phone  rang.

‘ Hello  dear!’  his  wife  said  urgently…’ Please  be  careful,  I  just  heard  on  the

radio  that   there is  a  car going  the wrong  way  on  the  Intestate  65 !’

‘Heavens ! ’  replied  the  husband, ‘ Not  only  one  car !  There  are  hundreds  going  the

wrong way !’



After getting all of the Pope's luggage loaded into the limo, and he doesn't travel light,
the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb.

"Excuse me, Your Eminence," says the driver,
"Would you please take your seat so we can leave?

"Well, to tell you the truth," says the Pope, "
they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I'd really like to drive today"

"I'm sorry but I cannot let you do that I'd lose my job!
What if something should happen?" protests the driver,
wishing he'd never gone to work that morning.

"There might be something extra in it for you," says the Pope.

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel.

The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport,
the Supreme Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.

"Please slow down, Your Holiness!!" pleads the worried ! driver,
but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.

"Oh, my God, I'm gonna lose my license," moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches,
but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.

"I need to talk to the Chief," he says to the dispatcher.
The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five.

"So bust him," said the Chief.

"I don't think we want to do that, he's really important," said the cop.

The Chief then asked, "Who ya got there, the Mayor?"

Cop: "Bigger"

Chief: "Governor?"

Cop: "Bigger"

Chief: "Senator?"

Cop: "Bigger"

"Well," said the Chief, "Who is it?"

Cop: "I think it's Jesus!"

Chief: "What makes you think it's Jesus?"

Cop: "He's got the Pope for a limo driver!"